Childlike Trust

IMG_0218Not long ago we drove 3.5 hours to find people on the heart of God.  We didn’t know anyone but we came across Sandy*.  Her eyes held a depth of hopelessness and disbelief like I didn’t know existed.  I have seen my share of hopelessness here but this took my breath away.  Living in poverty in a flood zone with her husband and six children, her life had been one of misery. She was born to a blind father and a crippled mother, and because of this had only known financial hardship and ridicule.

No hope for the future.  All of it smashed as everywhere she looked were problems and insurmountable challenges.  What could we do?  God has good things for her.  How can we lift her out of her despair?  Holy Spirit how do we partner with you here?  We took her shopping!  Piling up groceries, she stood crying holding on to her cart in the supermarket.  We told her of God’s love and that He cares.

A few days later, we sat with her outside her home as she ran into the arms of her loving Papa.  She ran into hope.  She ran into her great future in Him.  There was no immediate natural change to her circumstances at this point but her face shone!  Jesus broke through the darkness with His hope and light.

There was a song we had on a Bill Gaither record, back in the day.  It was one of my favorites and I would sing it over and over.

I’m just a child!  My life is still before me
I just can’t wait, to see what God has for me,
But I know that I will trust Him
And I’ll wait to see what life will bring for me.

When I thought about the words, often a feeling of absolute exhilaration would rush over me.  Now I know and recognize that it was the Holy Spirit.  Sometimes I felt like I would burst!  I clearly remember, driving along in our car with Mum during one of these encounter moments.  I shuffled forward to the edge of the back seat so I could lean through the gap in between the front seats to get Mum’s attention.  “Mum, I’m just so excited to see what God has for me!”.  “Oh, that’s good” she replied, as she drove and juggled probably a hundred of other things in her mind as a mother of four kids would be.  By her reaction, I knew she didn’t really understand quite what was going on for me at that moment.  I sat back in my seat but I kept on singing.

Childlike trust and wonder.  You know, I’m now in my late forties, but sometimes I still sing that song.  I still have great expectations for the future and am excited to see what God will do through my life.  I want to remain in that childlike position of perfect trust whether I’m in a dark season or not.

I pray that your heart will be filled with His hope.  I pray that you will be exhilarated by His goodness and promises and that He will bring you into a place of perfect trust and peace.
Let’s grow down.  Childlike trust.  He has good plans.

Journeying with you,
With love,

*Sandy is not her real name

Here we go…

from the rockI guess this is it.  Some form of accountability to you, my readers, to follow what God has been speaking to me about.  This is not natural in any sense.  For those who know me well, you will know that I have to force myself to write newsletters every few months.  God has a sense of humor.  But to me, it’s not so funny.  Actually, I cried when He first told me to write.  That was a good few years ago too!

But delayed obedience is not true obedience and I’m confessing that I have been disobedient.  To say “yes” when He told me to go to Africa, or to uproot my 13 year old and settle in the Philippines without having ever been there before, no problem!  But to write?  Big problem.  So many excuses.  My primary one, is that I don’t have time.  My days and nights are full here in the Philippines.  But if God says do it, we should do it.  And so today begins my obedience.

Once something is written, you can’t take it back.  It’s out there for everyone to see.  This is kind of scary to me. A blog is a snap shot of here and now.  A raw take on life.  In the early stages, there are will not be larger picture showing the journey and the growth.  My issue is that I know I am learning and growing all the time.  Thank goodness!  Things I said, ten years ago, I may not say now.  So I invite you to take my writing as such, written by someone who is learning constantly and come on a journey with me into this fluid, moving thing called life in Jesus.

I pray God takes my simple thoughts on living a life of love, of missions, and of church planting and uses them to inspire and help others.

But I also get the sense, that this is more about me living surrendered to beautiful Jesus.  He is transforming and changing us all and I hope we can walk this road together. Thanks for joining me.  Here we go….

See you in a few days.  xo

Photo Credit: Rachel Soh